Monday, January 16, 2012
Another beginning
Tomorrow my second semester starts. I am really excited about 2012. I sense that it will be a great year. This is going to be a short post... I just wanted to ask for prayer... God has been leading these weeks with two words... Spirit and Truth. I feel that this is how I am to live 2012, in spirit and truth, not that other years I wasn't supposed to live that way, but I really sense Him bringing those two words clearly into my mind as I spend time with Him. So please pray as I start this year.... pray that I will live a life lead by the Spirit (Holy Spirit) and Truth (His word).
Friday, December 30, 2011
More Sauls
A and I pray around the world most nights. We take her globe and put our finger on a country and pray for it. Of course having lived in a country that we truly love, our prayers are a bit more specific. The other day I was reading in Acts and I had this epiphany and prayed. I prayed for more Sauls in the country we once called home. There is persecution of the church there... burned to the ground, assaults, and threats... And as I read in Acts how Saul was one of those who went around looking for believers to bring them down and had a desire to get rid of all of them... I thought how amazing our God is and how He brought Saul into His kingdom. As soon as Saul became a follower of Christ, his life was in danger... ironic how his life became that of those he was after. So I ask that you pray this with me. The Sauls of the world to come to Christ and be amazing agents for the kingdom.
Driven
As I think about this year I wonder what drives me... Some are driven by love, jealousy, fear, pride, shame, honor, respect... Here are some things that drive me...
1. I want more of Him and less of me. I journal about this often... my life, my attitude, my everything... I want it to be about Him and not me.
2. I don't want to mess up as a mom. The fear of messing up my baby drives me to strive to be a good mom. Learn all I can and do all I can for this child the Lord has entrusted me with.
3. I am not clear of the future, but I can't wait to see what the Lord does. I am taking this one day at a time... school has started, but after that I'm not sure yet I have great expectations as to what will be and in order to see that, I am driven to do well.
4. I continue to learn about myself. I am a child of God, but there are many pieces that make me who I am in Him... And as I continue to grow and learn about the person that God has molded me to be is an adventure. I am a third culture kid... and being 100% Korean and 100% American is a difficult thing and continues to be a challenge as I weigh out the cultures, traditions and values of both cultures and form it into who I want me to be. Along with that I also have many things I have experienced in life that make me who I am and the person the Lord uses for His kingdom. I pray I will do all I can do in what the Lord has invested in me and that is a driving factor in my life.
These are just some thoughts that I had...
1. I want more of Him and less of me. I journal about this often... my life, my attitude, my everything... I want it to be about Him and not me.
2. I don't want to mess up as a mom. The fear of messing up my baby drives me to strive to be a good mom. Learn all I can and do all I can for this child the Lord has entrusted me with.
3. I am not clear of the future, but I can't wait to see what the Lord does. I am taking this one day at a time... school has started, but after that I'm not sure yet I have great expectations as to what will be and in order to see that, I am driven to do well.
4. I continue to learn about myself. I am a child of God, but there are many pieces that make me who I am in Him... And as I continue to grow and learn about the person that God has molded me to be is an adventure. I am a third culture kid... and being 100% Korean and 100% American is a difficult thing and continues to be a challenge as I weigh out the cultures, traditions and values of both cultures and form it into who I want me to be. Along with that I also have many things I have experienced in life that make me who I am and the person the Lord uses for His kingdom. I pray I will do all I can do in what the Lord has invested in me and that is a driving factor in my life.
These are just some thoughts that I had...
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
being a widow... the help that comes with it
Scripture commands the church to take care of the orphans and the widows. I have been truly blessed by those within the body that have risen to the occasion and taken care of us. But ... I think of those God has brought into my life that aren't in the body that He has used to bless my life. Today I got a phone call from Indonesia telling me that one of my favorite neighbors has passed away.
This man after A and I moved back to Indonesia was a man that took such good care of us. He would walk up to our house twice a day and make sure we were okay. If our gate was open he would close it back up and would yell at the kids if they were bothering us and tell them that they are too loud. He was the oldest man in our neighborhood and everyone listened to him. He would always sit in front of his house smoking his pipe and yelling at kids. People would always tell me to be careful, but with him around I felt safe. I knew he was watching out for us.
Today I got a call telling me that he wanted to hear about Jesus in his last days. The people that live in our old house spent his last days with him, telling him about the Jesus we love and helping take care of him.
I sit here late at night... mourning his death. I'm so sad... Tonight I cry because I could hear his voice and so thankful for the way God has brought this wonderful man into my life to protect me in the days that I needed it the most. From our very first year in Indonesia, he sat on his porch... waving every time we went by. As our language got better, P would sit and talk with him... When it was just me and A, he took extra care of us. Thank you!!!
Good-bye Pak (Mr.) A.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Reflections
I am devoting these next few days as days of reflection. As I have just finished my first semester of grad school and ending a calendar year, I was reminded by my tehteh (older sister), TB, that I should spend some time in journaling and blogging of such thoughts and reflections.
One thing I have learned this year is that we cannot hold the world to the standards that scriptures give.... they do not know it. My friend BB from school and I were talking about this one day after class... in politics and in society, the Christians criticize the world for such things as homosexuality, abortions, drugs... whatever it is and tell them they are being unmoral... what is moral to a generation that has none? What is sacred to a generation that has traded natural for the unnatural? How can we expect those who do not know truth to live by the truth? This is exactly why we are to be the salt and light of the world. This is exactly why we are to be an image of Christ. Today I read Acts 4 : 29-31...
"And now, Lord, look upon their threats and grand to your servants to continue to speak your word with all boldness, while you stretch out your hand to heal, and signs and wonders are performed through the name of your holy servant Jesus. And when they had prayed, the place in which they were gathered together was shaken, and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and continued to speak the word of God with boldness."
Pastor RB, tonight mentioned how the Christians are so worried that the world has "hijacked" the meaning of Christmas that the pulpit is used to talk about the "hijacking", which makes us "hijack" our own meaning of Christmas... looking outward to how others aren't doing it right. The thought that came to mind as I listened to RB tonight was again the fact that those out there don't know what the true meaning of Christmas. Yes they may watch Charlie Brown's Christmas on TV and get the Luke 2 message, but that really doesn't mean anything... because we, ourselves, are sold by the commercialism of this whole thing.
I say what I am about to say to myself and not just to others... If we look at the above verses, the prayer is lifted up because there are threats. These apostles have just been released after having been questioned and the high people have just told them that if they share about this Jesus again, there will be some serious punishments. How many of us find ourselves even needing prayer like this? I mean seriously how many of us have shared and are getting threats like that... none... but the fact of the matter is we aren't sharing because there are those unspoken threats... if we are religious and come across as Jesus freaks... people at work aren't going to hang out with us, we'll lose friends, we'll be named the Jesus freak, people may walk the other way when they see you coming toward them... I mean those are threats and some serious ones. Who wants to be the reject in the office and the one without friends?? No one... So we keep our mouths shut.
The apostles in these verses are praying for boldness. Something I lack to pray for. I think of the times I prayed for boldness and it has shaken my world.... just as the apostles felt after their prayer... Things happen when we pray. And I just think as I reflect on this year... I cannot continue to judge those of the world with standards of God... they don't know it. My job is to tell them, I mean that's why this season is here right?
Tonight on the way home from church I thought of how this time last year, I was making plans to come to the states for grad school. I was talking to my friend, the real estate agent, at housing options and going on TIU's campus trip... On the way to Indonesia, we visited some friends in Amsterdam and made some really good memories. Our final months in Indonesia went by as it filled with anticipation and pain. We moved here in April... So much has happened since then, but that will be for tomorrow's reflections.
One thing I have learned this year is that we cannot hold the world to the standards that scriptures give.... they do not know it. My friend BB from school and I were talking about this one day after class... in politics and in society, the Christians criticize the world for such things as homosexuality, abortions, drugs... whatever it is and tell them they are being unmoral... what is moral to a generation that has none? What is sacred to a generation that has traded natural for the unnatural? How can we expect those who do not know truth to live by the truth? This is exactly why we are to be the salt and light of the world. This is exactly why we are to be an image of Christ. Today I read Acts 4 : 29-31...
"And now, Lord, look upon their threats and grand to your servants to continue to speak your word with all boldness, while you stretch out your hand to heal, and signs and wonders are performed through the name of your holy servant Jesus. And when they had prayed, the place in which they were gathered together was shaken, and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and continued to speak the word of God with boldness."
Pastor RB, tonight mentioned how the Christians are so worried that the world has "hijacked" the meaning of Christmas that the pulpit is used to talk about the "hijacking", which makes us "hijack" our own meaning of Christmas... looking outward to how others aren't doing it right. The thought that came to mind as I listened to RB tonight was again the fact that those out there don't know what the true meaning of Christmas. Yes they may watch Charlie Brown's Christmas on TV and get the Luke 2 message, but that really doesn't mean anything... because we, ourselves, are sold by the commercialism of this whole thing.
I say what I am about to say to myself and not just to others... If we look at the above verses, the prayer is lifted up because there are threats. These apostles have just been released after having been questioned and the high people have just told them that if they share about this Jesus again, there will be some serious punishments. How many of us find ourselves even needing prayer like this? I mean seriously how many of us have shared and are getting threats like that... none... but the fact of the matter is we aren't sharing because there are those unspoken threats... if we are religious and come across as Jesus freaks... people at work aren't going to hang out with us, we'll lose friends, we'll be named the Jesus freak, people may walk the other way when they see you coming toward them... I mean those are threats and some serious ones. Who wants to be the reject in the office and the one without friends?? No one... So we keep our mouths shut.
The apostles in these verses are praying for boldness. Something I lack to pray for. I think of the times I prayed for boldness and it has shaken my world.... just as the apostles felt after their prayer... Things happen when we pray. And I just think as I reflect on this year... I cannot continue to judge those of the world with standards of God... they don't know it. My job is to tell them, I mean that's why this season is here right?
Tonight on the way home from church I thought of how this time last year, I was making plans to come to the states for grad school. I was talking to my friend, the real estate agent, at housing options and going on TIU's campus trip... On the way to Indonesia, we visited some friends in Amsterdam and made some really good memories. Our final months in Indonesia went by as it filled with anticipation and pain. We moved here in April... So much has happened since then, but that will be for tomorrow's reflections.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
favs
A and I have new favorites that I wanted to share with you. I have been so blessed by my favorite song and I love when A sings her new favorite songs. I really enjoy the Names of God in Hebrew. I don't know it just really speaks to my heart as I sing these praises. They are powerful. They have been out for a while, especially A's, but so good. Just wanted to share... A distraction to my procrastinating self from studying for tests!!! :)
At Your name (my fav)
El Shaddai (A's fav)El Shaddai, el shaddai
El-elyon na adonia
Age to age you're still the same
By the power of the name
El shaddai, el shaddai
Erkamka na adonai
I will praise and lift you high
El shaddai
Through your love and through the ram
You saved the son of Abraham
Through the power of your hand
You turned the sea into dry land
To the outcast on her knees
You were the God who really sees
And by your might
You set your children free
El shaddai, el shaddai
El-elyon na adonia
Age to age you're still the same
By the power of the name
El shaddai, el shaddai
Erkamka na adonai
I will praise and lift you high
El shaddai
El shaddai, el shaddai
El-elyon na adonai
Age to age you're still the same
By the power of the name
El shaddai, el shaddai
Erkamka na adonai
I will praise and lift you high
El shaddai
Through the years you've made it clear
That the time of Christ was near
Though the people couldn't see
What Messiah ought to be
Your most awesome work was done
Through the frailty of your son
I will praise and lift you high
El shaddai
At Your name (my fav)
At Your name, mountains shake and crumble
At Your name, the oceans roll and tumble
At Your name, angels will bow
The earth will rejoice, Your people cry out
Lord of all the earth we'll shout Your name, shout Your name
Filling up the skies with endless praise, endless praise
YAHWEH, YAHWEH, We love to shout Your name, O Lord
]
At Your name, the morning breaks in glory
At Your name, creation sings Your story
At Your name, angels will bow
The earth will rejoice, Your people cry out
Lord of all the earth we'll shout Your name, shout Your name
Filling up the skies with endless praise, endless praise
YAHWEH! YAHWEH! We love to shout Your name, O Lord
X2
We love to shout Your name, O Lord
At Your name, angels will bow
The earth will rejoice, Your people cry out
Forever I will love You
Always I will love You
Forever I will love You
You have won my heart
I will sing for You
At Your name, the oceans roll and tumble
At Your name, angels will bow
The earth will rejoice, Your people cry out
Lord of all the earth we'll shout Your name, shout Your name
Filling up the skies with endless praise, endless praise
YAHWEH, YAHWEH, We love to shout Your name, O Lord
]
At Your name, the morning breaks in glory
At Your name, creation sings Your story
At Your name, angels will bow
The earth will rejoice, Your people cry out
Lord of all the earth we'll shout Your name, shout Your name
Filling up the skies with endless praise, endless praise
YAHWEH! YAHWEH! We love to shout Your name, O Lord
X2
We love to shout Your name, O Lord
At Your name, angels will bow
The earth will rejoice, Your people cry out
Forever I will love You
Always I will love You
Forever I will love You
You have won my heart
I will sing for You
El Shaddai (A's fav)El Shaddai, el shaddai
El-elyon na adonia
Age to age you're still the same
By the power of the name
El shaddai, el shaddai
Erkamka na adonai
I will praise and lift you high
El shaddai
Through your love and through the ram
You saved the son of Abraham
Through the power of your hand
You turned the sea into dry land
To the outcast on her knees
You were the God who really sees
And by your might
You set your children free
El shaddai, el shaddai
El-elyon na adonia
Age to age you're still the same
By the power of the name
El shaddai, el shaddai
Erkamka na adonai
I will praise and lift you high
El shaddai
El shaddai, el shaddai
El-elyon na adonai
Age to age you're still the same
By the power of the name
El shaddai, el shaddai
Erkamka na adonai
I will praise and lift you high
El shaddai
Through the years you've made it clear
That the time of Christ was near
Though the people couldn't see
What Messiah ought to be
Your most awesome work was done
Through the frailty of your son
I will praise and lift you high
El shaddai
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