have you ever watched a movie that you've already watched before with someone who was watching it for the first time? i think it's the best when it's like an action movie, but love stories work this way as well. so you're sitting there watching the movie and in the beginning it's just setting the tone and sometimes the person who is watching it for the first time will ask you questions and you just smile saying, "watch..." then the plot starts to thicken, it's getting intense, the good guy seems like the bad guy or the couple breaks up or someone dies or a new character enters that turns the whole plot upside down and you don't know what to think. but the thing is you know how it's going to end. i really like watching the person get excited, sad, mad or whatever as they are trying to figure out what's going on... i just smile because i know what the end is going to be and it's going to be good. you just want to tell them something, but you don't want to ruin it for them, so you just watch their heart clench, release and hurt as the story plot goes...
yesterday during my date with Jesus, i read isaiah 46 and a verse stuck out at me... the verse that stuck out was 10, but i'm going to write 8-10...
"Remember this and stand firm, recall it to mind, you transgressors, remember the former things of old; for I am God, and there is no other; declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done."
declaring the end from the beginning...
i have been praying for God to open doors for me as i think of next steps. i could see myself doing so many different things. teaching children, moving overseas, being a stay at home mom, counseling, working with a church, being in a ministry, doing discipleship with new believers, running programs, translating, i speak three languages fluently and i know God could use that some way, etc.... and sometimes i get all flustered and feel antsy thinking about it, but as i read this verse, i felt a peace come over me. my God... my heavenly father declared the end from the beginning. He is God and there is no other and this God declares the end from the beginning. it was so reassuring to know that my God knows. this is the thing... i knew that... i tell A that all the time that God knows everything, things of old, things today and things tomorrow... but for some reason this verse spoke a different volume for me. interesting huh?? i love it!!
so i imagined God and me on this life being like when i sit with someone who hasn't watched the movie i have watched before. God knows the end and every time i say or ask things like, "seriously this is how it's going to end?" or "he isn't really going to be a character of this story is he?" or "what is that person in the story for? s/he seems so irrelevant." God just smiles and says, "watch and see..." sometimes He could even say, "it'll get better i promise..." or maybe even "this is just the beginning..."
the thing is this, some times i have friends who are like, "i can't believe you like that movie, it was so bad." even though it's like a movie i really like... or "wow that's not what i expected, i'm a little disappointed." anyway the point is... God tells us the end of our story... Jesus' return to take His people to eternity with Him in heaven... the suspense of getting there is what gets us, but does that have to get us... we know the end and it's a beautiful ending, which means that the story line in between will reflect that...
i need to remember in life when i get frustrated or just want to know... that God declared it from the beginning and that i don't have to get flustered over it... it will become clear when it's time. it's like the verse in psalms that i enjoy... i can't remember right now where it's from, but it says that God ordained the things in our life... ordained it...
this is the food for thought that i had.
my sister's church is having a VBS this week and A has been going to that, which leaves my time before my internship pretty open. it's been good quality time with my God.
please continue to pray for us... especially me as i do pray continually and look into options as i look into the future to see where the Lord would have me invest a season of my life. who knows i could be here for the next 20 years of my life... in indonesia for the next 5 years of my life... in new york for the next 10 months... in school for another 4 years... no one knows, but i'm open to anything that He would have for me. i've been praying for God to open doors for me in the direction He wants me to go and that i will have a discerning obedient heart as i take steps forward.
