Yesterday with a friend I went to the Target that P and I went to register for wedding and baby and did all of our shopping. I feel like there is so much emotion and change that I'm not sure which one to deal with when. So walking into Target was such a cultural experience after being in Indo for 2 years, but at the same time I was walking into a ton of memories. It was so overwhelming the thoughts going through my head while I was also getting things to organize our things.
Today I didn't even know what day it was or what the date was. It's just still all such a blur. But I spent the good part of the morning organizing A's and my room. Then went out to lunch with family and friends and now A is taking a nap and I am catching up on e-mails and stuff.
I am really thankful for what the Lord is doing in my heart. He is really good to me this past week and I just know that it will continue as I go into my new stage in life with A.
Good things God has done....
1. A is doing such a great job adjusting to all of this, daddy in heaven, time change, lots of new faces, new house... just everything. It's been a blessing.
2. I have so many great people around me. My brother-in-law said that cause there are so many people helping me, there is really nothing for him to do. That is true. Everyone is such a blessing!!!
3. My family here at the house. They are such a blessing. When all this happened and I told our pastor I needed a place to stay, I prayed that this family would say yes, and they did!! P told me so much about this family that I couldn't imagine anywhere else.
4. My emotional state has been really good. Of course with jet lag I still have so much to adjust to that I don't think everything has quite hit yet, but except occasional times of crying, I have been really hopeful in what the Lord has in store for A and I.
5. In saying that... I just have been thinking of how incredibly crazy this whole situation is and sometimes I just want to yell and be mad, but when I review all that have happened in leading up to P going to be with the Lord, I can't be mad because all I could see is God's hand in it all... all the events leading up to it. He is good.
6. The support from everyone all over the world. I have gotten e-mails, cards, people flying in from all over the world with encouraging words. How can I not say that God is good when He sends me so many people to love and care of A and I?
7. Our friends that are with us here from Indo. They are awesome and a true picture of God's goodness in my life.
and so much more...
The Lord is good. I still have a lot to process and pray through while healing from all of this, but because I see His goodness in my life, again I am so hopeful. The Lord is good and I want that to be the theme of my season right now. Through all the pain and hurt, tears and sorrows, memories and laughs, I want to continue to remember that He is good.
Please keep praying for A and I. I really want to establish stability for A during these next few weeks so that she could feel secure. So please pray that she and I could bond in a deeper level and as one of my friends put it, that the holy spirit will really help A understand all this. Most importantly I would not want A to think that Daddy left her, since it was so abrupt, so working through all that with her too. Yes just please just keep lifting us up.
Thank you and we love you!!
