i was in the middle of my quiet time this morning when i got a text from a friend all the way across the world to inform me of a death. my helper's husband passed away 11:45ish pm chicago time on february 20. i went numb as soon as i heard, didn't really know how to react... i was too far away. i called A over and we prayed for them... that's when it hit... i started crying.
my helper is no ordinary helper... she was family to us, but not only her, but also her husband. they have cared for us since A was 6 months, but when A and i went on our own a few years ago, they were so committed to doing whatever they can for us. she was by my side when i had leave A for the first time for language school, she taught my daughter the local dialect, she helped me pack up my house when P died, she's walked us through break-ins, through police stations, through people walking into our house and verbally attacking us, ... the list could go on. i feel helpless not being able to be next to her when she was continually next to me.
as i prayed throughout the morning, my heart just became so heavy. he's eternally in hell... a sense of guilt for not trying hard enough to tell him about christ overcame me... then i remembered my first days, weeks and months without P and how terribly hard it was... and i empathized with her and prayed for these dark days to come. my heart then became heavier... you see for the next 100 days, they'll be praying for his soul to enter heaven... people will start telling her to get married again... her kids... ugh... i praised God that my name is in the Lamb's book of life... and so when this tragedy happened to me, i knew deep down inside there was hope... she does not yet know this... i don't know how she's going to get through this without christ and my heart aches for her...
i got an e-mail today from a friend across the world. she said something so encouraging. she told me how our helper now will remember my strength and faith as she walks through this... i humbly pray that if my little example could be of any guidance to her salvation... please Lord let it be.
please pray for this family (she's young, 36, with two kids 13 and 3)... and for me... i feel so far away from home...
**a little frustrated i can't find a picture of their family... must be in one of the computers that was stolen.**
