this week has been hard with A turning three. my world came crashing down last night as the last celebration of her birthday ended. i just couldn't believe he was gone yet again and i found myself asking the same questions of why. it will never be as hard as the first several months, but it was tough. i cried and talked to a friend for like an hour...
today after dropping A off at pre-school (by the way, she did so well), i went to make some copies and ended up talking to a friend for an hour and crying. then i came home just to find myself wanting to watch the memorial service from indonesia. so i sat down and looked at the pictures first... that was intense. this was my first time watching it again... i want to ask those of you who were there... how did we do it? really God poured out so much grace over all of us to have gone through that and still have that service. P would have been dancing that day in heaven with Jesus being the center of the service and not him. it was really good... so hard to watch, but good. again just realizing how far i've come and seeing God's hand at work during that time.
KP thanks for walking me through that... letting me cry in the shower and taking care of A in the midst of your sorrow. thanks for standing beside me and handing me tissues... thank you so much for all that you did!!!
JP thanks for your encouraging words that day... made me cry all over again. you had so many sleepless nights and running around for us to come to the states. thanks for your care and all that time you took in making everything right.
Pak Y thanks for being our leader. you were like a brother to P and i. we really enjoyed going to your house every week. thanks for sharing that day of how much you loved us...
CC thanks for doing all the tedious little runs to the house and all the things i learned you did months later. P loved you so much and loved the time you had together... we really enjoyed having you over for meals. and yes A does like you.
MM thanks for watching the kids through those days. you weren't expecting that, but you did a great job!!!
small group thanks for making it a beautiful day with the flowers and food. you guys are the best.
teachers thank you for all you did. taking time off of teaching to come be with me. you all did so much for the paperwork process too and i just never thanked you. you all are amazing.
AB... thank you kang for all that you did. as i watched the video i just thought... wow this really all did happen. i am so glad that you spoke that day, as a friend, mentor, brother... you were phenomenal. the words you spoke were powerful. P loved you so much. we always looked forward to having time with you guys. i'm pretty sure he's waiting for a match of mandi tennis.
oh and K... thanks for getting things for A for the plane. that saved us a great deal during the almost 30 hours of travel.
i am so thankful to have so many different people in our lives. thank you all...
i am also thankful for TB. she told me a while back, way before P went to be with the Lord, she told me to pray that every time you fall (or go through something), pray that God will make the time you recover faster. i'm thankful for that wisdom from dear TB because i feel that now... i fall, but i feel it being less painful and it doesn't take weeks or days to recover.
i do think it will be hard for a few days, but again it is so much better each time around.
