Many have said that there will be reverse culture shock when I got back to the states. I’ve been feeling it now and then. Sometimes it’s so overwhelming that I just have to leave a place, but with everything that’s going on, I’m kind of dealing with whatever emotion is stronger.
I just wanted to write a little about my culture shock coming back to the states.
Where we were overseas, people talk really quietly, almost a whisper. We had to ask them to repeat what they say, not because we couldn’t understand them, but because we couldn’t hear them. In our bedroom, we could hear our neighbors taking a bath, so imagine us having a conversation. We know they could hear everything. When A was little, our neighbors would ask us what was wrong with A the night before if she cried or they would ask why she was laughing so hard. Saying that, I sometimes feel overwhelmed by how loudly people talk here in the states. For people who know me, they may think it’s ironic because I was pretty loud too, but I was our volume control in our family overseas. If P got loud, I’d have to tell him to quiet down unless he wants the whole neighborhood to hear. The thing is, our neighbors would probably just think we were fighting if we were so loud.
Materialism is a value I think in both places, but I think more people could show off their materialism here. I went shopping with family about two weeks ago and I couldn’t believe the prices. It said they had a sale and still the prices were so high, at least compared to where we were. Of course if I needed it I got it, but it was pretty shocking. I usually enjoy shopping, but after 30 minutes I asked my family to go home. Then the other day I went with a friend to American Girl. I’ve heard of that place, but man is that the center of materialism. I couldn’t believe the prices on those dolls… some of them more than a month’s wage for our neighbors.
And the salon… what ever happened to kids doing their own dolls’ hair and putting make up on them. Different era I guess…
A is so used to the kids overseas. They are very communal so toys are shared, food is shared, drinks are shared, you always bring enough for everyone, or give it up for the white girl… so when we got here and A was playing with kids like at the library and she had that mentality, kids looked at her funny and made walls for her not to cross to keep their space. We have experienced this communal environment with friends here, but overseas you do that with even strangers, so I think A was going through culture shock too because the kids were telling her that it was their space and stuff… poor girl.
Clothes are another culture shocker. People overseas like “western” clothes too and some wear western style clothes, but most women where we lived wore long pants/skirt, long shirt covering arms and bottoms and a head covering. I remember having conversations about modesty with P. I never really understood, but after being in such an environment and coming back here, I could see the contrast of it all. I read in the Bible about modesty for women… something about earrings… just was looking for it… can’t find it, but anyway… I really feel convicted of dressing modestly, now more than ever. I have to admit it’s hard when all they sell are those kinds of clothes. Like the other day I went to buy jeans, all they had were ultralow jeans and I’ve been looking for tanks that come up to my collarbone… can’t find it… anyway when I look at women and see what they are showing, sometimes I find myself having to look away and I think woah, then check myself.
Another culture shock for me that keeps coming out at me is all the advertisements on the highways with women in bikinis or nothing with arms around them with a phone number or address. I just couldn’t believe it. I know they were here before I left, but man it just hits you in a different way after being away. I couldn’t believe how immune we are to it and it’s nothing to so many when it’s SIN hanging all over the city… all over the world. How are we protecting our kids from that when it’s all over??? I am by no means saying there is no sin of that nature where we were, but it was not plastered all over for anyone and everyone to see. Hidden or shown, sin is sin, but I just felt like it’s easier when you’re advertising it on the highway.
There is much much more, but these are pretty much the big ones. I am really trying to keep an open mind, but I think it’ll take time to get used to all this again too. A and I are processing a lot. I mean along with the grieving… trying to balance our cultures and everything that’s happened over these months and years.
Thanks for reading. I would like to apologize if I have offended anyone by any comment. It is not to any one person, again these are just reactions to my reverse culture shock.
